It is not often one gets the chance to rail against something twice, but that opportunity has presented itself. This morning I saw a story and a picture online of Clocky, that awful alarm clock that runs and hides and brings society one step closer to Armageddon. For those who may not recall, I wrote about Clocky last week. If you don’t remember, just scroll down to the story Hell on Wheels, just a few blogs down.
Oh, Clocky, you demon from the depths of hell!
We got a chance to see Clocky today and he appears to be a cylinder, about the size of a beer can, covered with carpeting, with two wheels on each end. A 25-year-old MIT student created the demonic little timepiece and she is considering marketing her invention. I still see nothing good coming from this diabolical piece of modern technology.
To recap, Clocky rolls off your night stand when you hit the snooze button and runs and hides, so when the alarm goes off again, you have to chase him down. The people quoted in the many stories on the internet today seem to be enthusiastic about Clocky, as if he is a godsend rather than a work of the devil. Nothing against the young woman who brought him to life, but Clocky is one sinister machination. One of the people interviewed in a story about Clocky says that he set a record by hitting the snooze button once for five hours. This, my friend, is indeed a dubious record. It’s kind of like the time I sat down and ate an entire one-pound bag of M&Ms. I’ll admit to it, but I’m not proud of it. Sometimes I wish some of our old heroes could be resurrected to give us the advice we so sorely need. In this case I think we need a man like John Wayne. One look at Clocky and he would reprise his role as Rooster Cogburn in True Grit, and stare down the evil clock, and vocalize the following:
“Fill your hand you (little) sonofabitch!”
Clocky appears to be well padded and almost indestructible, but I have faith in my fellow Americans, and we will find a way to break the little bastard. He can run and hide, but we’ll find him and we’ll bust him, good.
I, for one, will not mourn his passing, but my fear is that they will make more like him to replace the ones we destroy. I just hope we all don't lose sleep worrying what sort of a calamity he will bring us.
Because we need our sleep in Jimbo’s world.
2 comments:
What if you can't find it? Then what? It just goes off for hours until the buyer cleans their room and finds it amoung the rubble?
In a civilized society such a situation shouldn't exist, but we must admit that in our salad days of youth the evil timepiece could have hidden from us indefinitely.
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