reflections on elections

The day of the Palestinian election last week, the early exit polls said that the Hamas party had been defeated by a wide margin and would be a minority party in the Palestinian government. Bush went on TV and said it was a great day for democracy in the Middle East because a million Palestinians had voted in democratic elections. Bush practically took credit for the vote as if it would add to his legacy as the man who democratized that region of the world.

I’ll admit that I didn’t believe we could export American liberalism to the Middle East—especially an administration whose mantra was that they didn’t believe in liberalism. I had that brief optimistic feeling I did on that November evening back in 2004, when the exit polls here held out the very valid hope that Bush had been defeated. It had always been impressed upon me that America was the land of the free; home of the brave. I had read about the great things this country had done and I saw evidence of it around me, and to this day you’d better bet I believe it.

Bush had dishonored the country and the flag. He had failed to protect the constitution and yet there were still voters willing to go into the voting booth and put a checkmark behind his name. While the President entertained us with selections from My Pet Goat, his Saudi friends attacked America. While not being able to defend ourselves from these attacks might have ended the careers of most politicians, it only made Bush more popular. And that November, the election was so close that the Bush campaign brought out their top ally, Osama Bin Laden—the man we generally accept as being responsible for the attacks—to give an eleventh-hour stump speech to try to seal the election.

Even so, after I had voted, and those around me, there was only to wait and wait we did. When we began to see early exit polls, it appeared that Osama’s speech had not swayed enough voters and that Bush would be narrowly defeated. The exit polls that night were wrong, as you may remember, as they were the night of the Palestinian election.

Oops.

The following day, when the votes were counted in the Palestinian election, we found the exit polls were dead wrong and that the majority of Palestinians had put a checkmark behind the name of terror.

“Well, Jimbo,” I’m sure most of you are saying, “You’re not bringing much joy into my Sunday morning.”

My answer, of course, is that it is all in how you look at it—“spin it,” if you will. Every comedy television series has some dope of a sidekick who is doing dumb things, every episode, all season long. No matter how many dumb things he or she does, it is funny—the more dumb things, the funnier. We’ve come to expect this out of our Commander-in- Chief, also, every day; every week, every month, every year. Over and over, over and over. When you see Bush on television, you stop what you’re doing and watch and listen, just as you do when the door to Jerry Seinfeld’s apartment opens and Kramer comes in. What will he do this time?

And, for Hamas? Well, now that they are in power, maybe they’ll straighten up and fly right. And, if they don’t, well, will it be any worse than it is right now?

And, as for Wubya? Well, we have three more years of laughs before some other jughead takes his place. Maybe we won’t get an ex-rummy and ex-junky next time. I’m betting the constitution will be around long after Bush is gone.

At least, that’s our take here in Jimbo’s world.